kiss the mountains goodbye

tonight my mom came to visit me and we went out for dinner. she says its alright, whatever i want to do, just as long as i don't drop out of university. that's fine with me i guess. I never really wanted to drop out. I just don't like the way it is right now. I will get things straightened out.

yesterday I hung out with kendra and that was fun. we ate fake meat and went to see hannibal, it was good, but we didn't get to see the end because the projector messed up. we got two refunds though so that was neat.. getting paid $12 for going to see a movie does not happen every day. unless you are a movie critic or something.

i also got three new cd's today, my mom bought them for me. i got the new bratmobile album, the super friendz album mock up scale down and the halo benders album god don't make no junk. she also brought me some cupcakes. mmmmm. I saw a rat run across the church steps. sometimes it's cold. sometimes it's not. sometimes I can't decide. i remember my dad telling me once how he admired me because when i had a conviction, i stuck with it, like how i never gave up on being vegetarian. i still have that one but I feel like i dont make convictions anymore. I don't do anything anymore. my brain is turning into placatant mud. i thought i used to be really creative or something. not clever about it but just creative. oh well. my childhood is over and now i am just a vessel for reproduction. maybe i should donate my eggs and get $3,500.