melodrama blah blah blah

i made my thing into a unicorn. i need a new mouse. i just realized its tail looks like a leaping trout, that is alright though. it is the fish spirit from with in the unicorn trying to break free. I am trying to decide if i like the person i am right now. usually i have just based this on popular opinion. i can't think of a time when i really liked me. i think now i might like me even less. sure, things have changed for the better, i no longer have to hide in the bathroom at recess, my acne is gone, i don't enjoy the sounds of save ferris anymore, I don't lie in bed at night and construct fantasy worlds in my head where i am somebody else, i don't lash out in frustration, i don't drape clothing five sizes too big over my emaciated frame, i don't have an emaciated frame anymore, i gave up the penny loafers for the birkenstocks for my brother's old combat boots for a pair of ratty old sneakers from payless and some italian leather knee high boots, I can't find any more enjoyment in roleplaying online or chat rooms, when everyone pairs off i'm not the one left without a partner, i can go shopping alone, i am not as ashamed of my height, and so on. four years ago i must have been a completely different person. is it good? is it bad? who cares. right now i have two kitties purring and rolling around in my lap and they do not seem to care what i am. it is nice.